7 Things To Keep On Your Desk That Will Intimidate Your Co-Workers
11:30 am, October 12th | by
Earlier this week, we talked about
five essential items to keep on your desk that will make you more productive and efficient. But what if you already have those essentials? And what if you’ve decided to take advantage of your office’s open floor plan to intimidate all of your coworkers with the awesome stuff on your desk? Since it’s Friday, we’ve out together seven items you can keep on your desk that will make your coworkers think “Wow, girl’s got her life together” and then vow to start making more lists. Read through to be prepared for your next week at work.
Obviously, the primary purpose of fresh flowers on your desk is to remind your coworkers that people outside the office think that you're awesome, and you have a great and intimidating social life. But the secondary purpose of an enormous bouquet of fresh flowers on your desk is so that you can peer through them at your officemates like a jungle cat.
Fancy snacks say to your coworkers, "On the weekends, when you're hung over and just trying to forget about it all? I'm at the farmer's market buying kale, and I probably rode my vintage bicycle there too."
Sure, everyone knows you went to college. But do they know where, when, and what the card stock on your diploma feels like? Plus, literally all diplomas look intimidating — I went to an arts school for my master's and my diploma looks like it's meant for a cardiothoracic surgeon. Can't go wrong with this one.
4.Pretentious coffee/artisanal coffee mugs
"I only drink local brews made with my french press. Your latte is cute, though."
If your office is like mine, nobody has stamps and everyone always needs them. Vintage stamps say "my office supplies are curated, not just stolen from other people's desks or picked up at Staples." Super intimidating.
6.A desk full of makeup
Oh, there's an office happy hour after work? You simply can't make it, there's a gala you have to get to. Oh, and also? You've mastered false eyelashes.
7.A whimsical first aid kit
When your coworker trips and skins his knee bringing you your latest flower arrangement, whip out artisanal Band-Aids that will make everyone in your office wonder if there is anything in your life that is not carefully selected and prepared for to maximize intimidation of your peers. And the answer will be "Why no, there isn't" as you smile serenely at them through the peony hedge on your desk. Nailed it.
On The Budget, Healthy Happy Life, Apartment Therapy, Oempromo.com, Flickriver, Pelle Capelli, Fruugo]