I don’t know about you, but there are few things that give me more pleasure than dogs, and dogs eating things that they’re not supposed to eat. So it’s hard for me to believe that street vendors in New York City are just now getting in on the frozen dog treat market.

A new month is an opportunity to make changes — like bringing lunch to work. You’ll save money and eat healthier. What’s not to love?

After a long day of work, coming home to cook can be the last thing you want to do, but a girl’s got to eat, right? I rounded up 5 of my favorite healthy, easy-to-make recipes (that don’t include Chinese take-out) to help make after-work relaxation a little more feasible. Keep reading for 5 dinner options that can be cooked up in 30 minutes or less.

Remember the good ol’ days, sharing a bedroom mirror with your five best — well, four best friends and Katie (ugh), getting ready for the graduation dance, listening to Kevin Lyttle’s “Turn Me On,” fighting over who was going to get to talk to Mike Patakie first, adjusting the straps of your fluorescent pink halter top, swapping a Dr. Pepper Lipsmacker between all of your gurlz (except Katie…ugh), spreading Bonne Bell glitter gel on your eyelids, waking up the next morning with a stray butterfly clip lodged in the back of your hair and a stye from sharing eyeliner with Madison behind the bleachers? Those were the best days of your life.

Break-ups are rough, even when they don’t happen to us. Songbird Taylor Swift, whose many relationship misadventures have reportedly made her feel like the laughingstock of the country, takes romantic splits especially hard, and that’s why someone created this amazing prayer candle featuring the faces of her former flames above the words, “You were the best thing that’s ever been mine,” the lyrics to her sweet, non-vengeful tune, “Mine.”

We’ve put together a list of 2012′s most arbitrary and condescending lady-products. For optimal user experience, we suggest having Josh Groban read this to you off of a ladyflower-shaped computer screen while you inhale subtle notes of lavender, lilac, and household cleaner. Because you’re a woman.

Up until today, I thought I received everything a girl could ever want for Christmas. Then I learned of the existence of Grumpy Cat pasties and realized just how much I’ve been missing out on life.

The Hot Guy Alarm Clock will make you question everything, starting with “WHO IS IN MY BEDROOM?!?!?!”

For years, I’ve been looking for the perfect holiday accessory that straddles the fine line between “naughty enough to make Santa check his list twice” and “being a flat-out ho, ho, ho.” (Coincidentally, I’ve also been looking for the perfect occasion to use all my sexual yuletide puns.) I think I’ve found this year’s winner in Ta.ta.toos.

True, NASA says there’s no way the world is going to end on December 21st, 2012. That hasn’t stopped a bunch of hysterics from becoming obsessed with the end of the world. The big day is only a week away — what to do if you’re nervous? Shop the pain away, duh.