You've Got To Be Kidding

Tall Girls Rejoice: Global Warming May Stunt Your Growth

5:30 pm, February 23rd | by Laura Donovan

While unsettling and potentially devastating for the planet, global warming has at least two upsides: A non-winter on the east coast and possible growth stunting. No one wants to be exceptionally short, but it’s no picnic being a tall female either.

Researchers at the University of Florida and University of Nebraska have discovered a correlation between the earth’s temperature and size of animals, with higher temperatures resulting in littler critters. Using the fossils of horses to study the evolution of bovines from over 50 million years ago, paleontologists claim the animals’ sizes decreased as temperatures went up and vice versa. According to The Daily Mail, Florida Museum of Natural History curator Dr. Jonathan Bloch said the horses shrunk to the size of house cats at one point in history. If you’ve ever wanted a “lap horse,” I suppose you were born in the wrong era.

The height change could apply to humans as well, say the researchers, and make people much smaller. But is this the end of the world? I certainly don’t think so, and University of Michigan professor Philip Gingerich seems to share a similar sentiment:

“I joke about this all the time – we’re going to be walking around 3 feet tall if we keep going the way we’re going. Maybe that’s not all bad and if that’s the worst it gets, it will be fine.”

Global warming is awful for our world, but it could provide you with temporary relief if you’re over the average height for your gender.

TAGS: Global warming | short people | Tall people

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