Man’s Fecal Matter-to-Gold Experiment Causes Apartment Inferno
10:46 am, October 21st | by Amy Tennery
Ireland’s Paul Moran (probably) desperately wanted to be rich, so he did what seemed most logical. Started a business or got a job in a lucrative field? Hah! No. He mixed his feces with fertilizer and then heated them up. In order to create gold. Somehow.
The plan went spectacularly awry, however, when the poopilizer caught fire, according to the Belfast Telegraph, and a large chunk of his apartment burned to the ground.
Moran was sentenced to three months in jail for his scheme. Fun side note: judges in Ireland sound totally chill. Check out what Moran’s judge said at the sentencing:
“It was an interesting experiment to fulfill the alchemist’s dream, but wasn’t going to succeed.”
Really? “Interesting?” Not, “Hey, genius, you can’t turn your poo to gold and, oh, by the way, you could have killed someone trying.” Lovely.