So This Just Happened

Man Sues BMW, Claims Motorcycle Gave Him 20-Month Erection

I suppose they don’t call them “crotch rockets” for nothing?

A man in California is suing BMW’s North American arm after experiencing what he claims is a motorcycle-induced, 20-month-long erection. It is simultaneously one of the more dubious and sympathy inducing legal cases you’re likely to hear.

The alleged victim of vehicular stiffitude claims he rode his BMW motorcycle for four hours, after which he experienced a “non-stop” erection, according to a local CBS affiliate. Not that we have any personal experience with this but it sounds really awful. The complainant is suing for lost income, medical costs and “general damage,” a mercifully vague euphemism.

Of course, as CBS points out, there are a couple of key problems with this gentleman’s complaint — the first of which being that there’s no medical evidence to prove a motorcycle seat could give you a 20-month-long erection. Ah, there’s the rub. (Too soon?)

The other issue? The seat, which the complainant installed after purchasing his instrument of entirely unexpected torture, also wasn’t manufactured by BMW.

Still, we feel for you, buddy. If only someone would give you a han — … ah, actually, never mind.

TAGS: motorcycle erection lawsuit

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