Think Earth Day is a silly holiday? Prefer the Google Doodle for Leonhard Euler’s 306th birthday to today’s rising and setting sun? Haven’t spent a moment thinking about used batteries? WELL ALL THAT IS ABOUT TO CHANGE BECAUSE THIS EARTH DAY RAP FROM THE 1990S IS ABOUT TO ENTER YOUR BRAIN SKULL AND REDUCE AND REUSE ALL YOUR THOUGHTSPACE FOR ITS ANTI-POLLUTION POLEMIC. So word to your mother, eco-friendly is here to stay.

With the Supreme Court hearing arguments in favor of striking down Prop 8, California’s ban on gay marriage (and the possible repeal of DOMA), we took a look at some of the many federal benefits conferred upon straight married couples by the government, just in time for tax season!

In today’s EOD roundup, watching Amy Poehler interview her hero (in a flirty neckerchief, mind you!) is the best way to welcome the sunshine and lollipops of spring.

For the past two days, the Supreme Court has been examining the constitutionality of cases related to same-sex marriage and the female justices have been dropping mics all over the oral arguments.

In today’s EOD roundup, Clarissa Explains It All creator Mitchell Kriegman is writing a where-is-she-now book about Clarissa Darling: “The novel will follow a 23-year-old Clarissa as she tries to crave out a career as a journalist and deals with the obstacles toward becoming a real adult.” If Clarissa doesn’t have a blog, live in a converted loft in Williamsburg/Bushwick, and still hang out with Sam who works in the Park Slope co-op and brews his own kombucha, I’ll eat my bowler hat.

Former Secretary of State and potential presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton endorsed gay marriage on Monday, making her announcement in a new six-minute video released by the Human Rights Campaign.

In today’s EOD roundup, San Francisco Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone argued in a Catholic Herald profile that “legislating for the right for people of the same sex to marry is like legalizing male breastfeeding” which begs the question: is male breastfeeding illegal?! What would the forefathers think?! I thought I was living in America, not SOVIET RUSSIA.

In today’s EOD roundup, the new argument against gay marriage is that “marriage should be limited to unions of a man and a woman because they alone can ‘produce unplanned and unintended offspring.’” Wait — I don’t — but — what?

Kate Lambert, the funny lady who made knee-slapping clip, “How to Sponsor a Uterus” earlier this year, has come out with an equally amusing parody video on gay rights. In “Get Cash 4 Rights,” folks of a different sexual orientation state they’re tired of upsetting other people with their sexuality and would gladly take money over the rights for which they are ineligible.