Hey Todd Akin, how’s the last month been for you? I don’t want to make you feel weird or anything, but a lot of people want you to drop out of the Missouri Senate race. Claire McCaskill wants you to drop out, but that’s not surprising given that she’s your opponent. Paul Ryan wants you to drop out of the race, which should be something of a red flag. Mitt Romney wants you to drop out of the race, because you’re an unrepentant misogynist making things more difficult for him. You’re embarrassing many Republicans, who are now afraid of being known as members of the party of “legitimate rape.” I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that a lot of people would be pretty psyched if you decided today, which is the deadline for withdrawal from the race, to shut that whole thing down. And yet, you persevere.

Penguins are fairly well-behaved creatures, so it must take a pretty intimidating or frightening person to send one of the birds into fight mode.

If you’ve kept up with the GOP primaries in the slightest, you know perpetual “third place, worst place” (all right, I know that doesn’t rhyme, but it was quite a zinger during my elementary school days fifteen years ago) candidate Newt Gingrich isn’t doing so well in the race. He’s behind rivals Rick Santorum and Mitt Romney, and for better or worse, his personal life has overshadowed much of his long career, yet he refuses to step down from the running, so Jeff Greenfield of Yahoo!’s The Ticket has compared him to the pitiful Black Night of “Monty Python and the Holy Grail.”

Judging by some of the forced news items on goofy things that have happened on the campaign trail, you’d think the GOP primary race is an award-winning comedy. Many of the candidates have earned their place in “Saturday Night Live” sketches, but here’s the issue with this overload of silliness: The primaries are not funny, they’re actually pretty dull and depressing — even Barbara Bush agrees with that last part — so pretending this has any humor value is as naive as  thinking your 3 a.m. booty call is actually in love with you.

If we’ve learned anything from this rollercoaster of a Republican primary race, it’s that a person’s high school identity determines nothing about an individual’s future success. The three top contenders couldn’t have been more different in their teen years — Mitt Romney was the big man on campus, Newt Gingrich was somewhat of a rebel loner, and Rick Santorum was just a regular sporty dude — yet they’re all eagerly competing for the presidency. Whether you’re an outsider, the golden boy, or just another face in the crowd in high school, you can grow up to run for one of the most powerful positions in the world.

They’ve evolved considerably since their more carefree days, but in light of BuzzFeed’s discovery of one of Santorum’s high school photos, we’ve dug up each candidate’s back story and concluded which guy we would have most wanted to hang out with during high school.

Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich is low in the polls and has only won the primaries in two states, but he won’t be pulling out of the race anytime soon.

If Kristin Chenoweth is anything like her “GCB” character Carlene, she may go southern mean girl on presidential candidate Newt Gingrich for saying the new ABC sitcom is unfair to Christians.

Responding to Gingrich’s recent comment about the new program promoting “anti-Christian bigotry,” the Oklahoma-born actress told Broadway.com, “No, Newt, don’t talk about my show! I would never do anything that would make fun of my own religion! I don’t think [GCB] does that.”

This election year, females everywhere have come out against GOP presidential contenders and conservatives for their stances on contraception and women’s health issues, but few have talked about which candidates would best serve working women.

Have you ever taken a look at GOP presidential candidate Newt Gingrich and wondered, “How does a guy like that have so much game?”

Like many critics of ABC’s new sitcom “GCB,” which is based off a book called “Good Christian Bitches,” Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich believes the show title is offensive to Christians.

During a Friday campaign stop in Gulfport, Miss., the Catholic former Speaker of the House said a similar program about Muslims would be considered unfit for broadcast and bigoted whereas a show that makes fun of Christians is okay by the Hollywood elite.