The Mindy Project Recap: Doctor/Patient Immaturity
9:30 am, November 14th | by Sarah Devlin
Poor Mindy — she can’t even have a lazy morning in bed with her boyfriend without it going terribly wrong. In this case, things “take a turn” (in Josh’s words) when he hops out of bed and puts on Mindy’s jeans by mistake, managing to comment both on the waistline and the Jolly Ranchers in the pockets before he realizes his mistake and Mindy kicks him out so she can spend the morning marinating in shame.
At work, Jeremy suddenly wants to talk about their most recent booty call, during which he left an expensive watch at her apartment. For reasons that are opaque to me, she refuses to give it back. It’s interesting that in this male-dominated (apart from the receptionist pool) workplace, it’s apparently not a problem for anyone to know that Mindy and Jeremy slept together. I realize the show’s a fantasy but a little bit of lip service to that idea might be nice. Luckily for Jeremy, there’s a seasoned breaker and enterer on staff in Ike Barinholtz’s male nurse Morgan, who agrees to break into Mindy’s apartment to decorate it for her half-birthday. I’m so glad that the show isn’t dropping his ex-con storyline now that he works in the office; it has endless potential.
Later, Mindy is working on a “happy retirement” card for her former gynecologist, when Danny comes in and she tells him Dr. Schulman (their boss) refused to take her on as a patient because they have a personal relationship. Danny says he would do no such thing, since to him Mindy is indistinguishable from a desk lamp. However, he doesn’t think she could be his patient, because he’s “seen how [she] looks at [him] when [he] wears a T-shirt.” Naturally, Mindy is desperate to prove him wrong and announces she’s his new patient. They shake on it. Danny looks a little psyched. This is sure to be a success!
So, as Jeremy burgles Mindy’s apartment (when will he have a storyline with both Mindy and Danny, and not just one of them? Is that some sort of rule?) Danny….burgles Mindy’s personal life, asking her all manner of questions in their consultation ranging from “How heavy is your flow?” to “How would you describe the nature of your sexual activity?” Mindy gets super uncomfortable but refuses to back down. Girl. I cannot imagine anything more terrifying than having your coworker as your gynecologist. Give this one up! Jeremy gets super creepy at Mindy’s apartment when the jig is up and he has to admit to his real mission, intoning “[The party] was a fiction. And I, it’s author.”
Mindy and Danny continue to make things more personal, with Danny questioning her desire to have kids (Jaden, Madison, Bree and Piper) while she makes a dig at him about not being able to “stay married.” In return, Danny does some Sitcom Math calculating how long it would take Mindy to find someone to marry/impregnate her, concluding there’s no shot for her to have kids before 44. She freaks out and complains to Anna Camp that she wants children and grandchildren who will spend her money being “crazy socialites.” Anna Camp reassures her that when she meets the right guy, she won’t see it coming.
Jeremy gets dressed down for being a creep by Betsy from the office, who was taken in by the half-birthday scheme. She throws the watch at him and stomps out, and it looks like he feels a little bit bad. Morgan gives her an inspiring speech about being the best warrior version of herself, and she responds by stomping into the exam room to finish what she started with Danny. She wavers at the weigh-in but calls upon her warrior alter ego (Beyoncé Pad Thai) and stays the course. They talk a bit about Danny’s personal life, for a change, and he seems to get a bit uncomfortable as the exam progresses. What follows is maaaaybe the first sensual breast exam recorded on network TV? Can someone research this?
Danny can’t hang; Mindy gloats; he takes a week off. Jeremy makes sure that Betsy sees that he didn’t take the watch after all. All is right with the world in this weird, weird office.