This Baby Goat Gets Us
12:30 pm, August 26th | by Colette McIntyre
You know those days when nothing — absolutely nothing — is looking right? When the cropped turtleneck-blouse hybrid that you just overpaid for at Urban Outfitters is giving you Hulk Hogan shoulders, all of your jeans are accentuating the deflated Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon that you call an ass, your skin looks like a Slip ‘N Slide, and wait, did “The Burger King” just walk into the room? Oh, no, that’s just your giant headed reflection staring back at you, looking like some horrific Bratz doll come to life. We all hate the mirror some days, but luckily, unlike this baby goat, we don’t have the cranial fortitude to act upon our loathing and resentment.
Alright little lady goat, come with me. We’re going to listen to some Des’ree , eat frozen yogurt, and say affirmations until you are feeling uplifted and can confront that mirror with a more accepting demeanor.